What not to say to a woman

Men and women just don't think or communicate in the same way. No news there, I know. But if you're a man here are some things you might want to avoid saying.

What Not to Say to a Woman

• "What happened to your hair ? Will it stay like that ?"
• "Are you going to wear that tonight ? I thought you were going to get changed."
• "Birthday ? Who's birthday ?"
• "Did your clothes shrink in the drier ?"
• "Your sister is nice. What's her name ?"
• "You're how old ?"
• "Do you think you've been putting on some weight ?"
• "Look ! There's my old girl friend. Let's go over and talk to her."
• “Is that grey hair ?”
• "That's not the way XYZ did it."
• "What I really like about you is your tits."
• "Do you want to borrow my razor ?"
• "Did you have a shower earlier ?"
• "It only looks bad from certain angles."
• "Have any of your friends ever had a 3-some ?"
  
• "Why don't you get your hair cut like XYZ."
• "You remind me of XYZ."
• "That was probably the 2nd best sex I've ever had."
• "It is nice. It just doesn't really suit you."
  
• "I think you look O.K. for your age."
• "When you hit 40 I'll change you for 2 20s ."
• "If I win the lottery I'll give you half."
  
• "I thought you were taller."
• "It's just a little bit of cellulite. Nothing to worry about."
• "As long as it's quick. There's a program coming on in 15 minutes."
• "Marriage is for mugs."
• "I'd like you to be a bit more feminine."
• "Your share of the meal works out at ...."
• "What size do you wear now ?"
• "Have you always been a girl ?"
• "They look exactly the same as your other shoes."
• "Have you thought about getting one of those bras that lifts ?"
• "Pizza is a meal."
• "I know you said you just wanted a cuddle but I'm horny now."
  
• "Is it O.K. if I put the lights out before you take that off ?"
• "I still remember when you were really sexy."
• "I was only talking to her, I mean I could have - I just didn't want to."
• "Are you going out without your make-up ?"
• "I don't even like going to that bar - it's always full of young girls."
• "My tongue's got cramp."
• "All my other girlfriends were good looking but had no personality."
• "Your dress looks fine. No-one's looking at you anyway."
  

Never ever use the word "weight". Think - hole, small twigs and leaves. There is no possible way to avoid being thought of as a callous bastard after you use this word in any context about your partner - e.g. ...

"Have you lost weight ?" translated is "So you did think I was fat ?"

Feel free to add your own examples of what not to say in the comments section.